Anna Nicole Smith was a Christian woman. Anna Nicole Smith always wore a cross around her neck. Anna Nicole Smith had a tattoo of Jesus Christ and a cross emblazoned on her lower right leg.
This past Sunday morning, March 25, 2007 Pope Benedict XVI gave a sermon at the St. Felicity and Martyred Sons Church in northern Rome, Italy. St. Felicity was a rich widow with seven sons who lived in the second century AD in Rome, Italy. Like Tiger Woods St. Felicity devoted herself to charitable work. St. Felicity and her 7 sons refused to renounce Christianity and so she was forced to watch as her sons were murdered one by one. Finally she was beheaded by Publius the Prefect of Rome on the orders of the Roman Emperor Marcus Antoninus Pius. Had she just agreed to worship Minerva the Roman Goddess of wisdom, intelligence and learning she could have kept her head. Tiger Woods is renowned for keeping his head while those around him falter.
Buddhism has taught Tiger Woods how to concentrate and to focus despite facing indescribable pressure. The Buddhist Master Dogen said, "To study the Buddha Way is to study the self. To study the self is to forget the self. To forget the self is to be enlightened by the ten thousand things." To be enlightened by the ten thousand things is to recognize the unity of the self and the ten thousand things. Ten Thousand Things is a Buddhist expression representing the dynamic interconnection and simultaneous unity and diversity of everything in the universe. On the PGA tour only Tiger Woods has the priceless ability under intense pressure to forget himself, the fans, the title, the money and the pressure. Only Tiger Woods can transport himself at will into the calm, tranquil zone. Unlike Anna Nicole Smith he doesn't need 9 different tranquilizers to stay composed. He also doesn't have Howard K. Stern carrying his bag. Coincidentally Catholicism has 10,000 Saints, including St. Felicity.
John Lennon proclaimed that he was bigger than Jesus Christ. John Lennon and Paul McCartney wrote about the ten thousand things in "I Am the Walrus". John Lennon and Paul McCartney wrote, 'I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together. See how they run like pigs from a gun see how they fly." According to Craig Stadler the walrus was Paul because on the cover of "Magical Mystery Tour" Paul McCartney is dressed as a walrus. According to Pope Benedict this past Sunday in Rome "Hell exists and is eternal even if nobody talks about it much anymore" according to reports by the Catholic News Service and the London Times.
After her beloved son Daniel Smith died in her hospital bed beside her on Sept. 10, 2007 in the Bahamas Anna Nicole Smith called her astrologer in Los Angeles to contact Daniel Smith in the afterlife. Anna Nicole Smith became convinced that Daniel Smith had become trapped in purgatory and that she had to go there to save him. This is why she was knocking back chloral hydrate in her final days like it was Pepsi. She had told everyone that she wanted to die, and she was saved from drowning at her Horizons home by Big Mo. Purgatory is where Christians go after death to suffer for several years to atone for their sins and try not to get thrown into the eternal fire of Hell. Anna Nicole Smith martyred herself to rescue Daniel Smith into Heaven. This year Masters Sunday falls on Sunday, April 8, 2007, Easter Sunday. Surely the pregnant Elin Nordegren Woods is not being given Methadone by Tiger Woods. It's bad for the baby.
This past Sunday in Rome Pope Benedict XVI said, "The Christian faith is not imposed on anyone, it is a gift, an offer to mankind." Apparently no one told Pope Benedict about the horrors of the 300 year Inquisition, or the Christian Crusade into the Middle East announced publicly by Brother Bush 3 years ago. Pope Benedict XVI also said, "Limbo, purgatory, supposed since medieval times to be a "halfway house" between heaven and hell is only a theological hypothesis and not a definitive truth of the Christian faith." In other words while the entire world has been mesmerized by the Anna Nicole Smith train wreck the absolute authority on the Christian faith announced that Purgatory itself is baloney. Deborah Opri on behalf of baby Dannielynn Smith is now filing a wrongful death action against the Vatican. Previously the only person in history to win a lawsuit against the Holy Father was the grandfather of Paris Hilton, Barron Hilton. Barron Hilton's little half sister is the mother of Zsa Zsa Gabor.
So Pope Benedict XVI comes out last Sunday just before Easter and announces that Hell is a fact, a place where non Christians go. Did you ever wonder where your pagan ancestors went after death for 5 million years before the birth of Jesus 2,000 years ago?
While he was blowing away Purgatory last Sunday why didn't Pope Benedict XVI come right out and tell you what every single Bible Scholar on earth knows. You are not going to believe this. This is the biggest news story of all time and no one will ever hear it. Five million newspapers, magazines, television stations and weblogs and this story which you are about to hear is not considered newsworthy. If the mainstream media ever picked this up it would be the end of Christianity and Holy Christian Wars forever, but they never will because they, their advertisers and their subscribers are Christian. This is the dirty little secret of Christianity which if it ever got out would end the religion forever. Listen to this:
The New Testament was first written in Greek decades after Jesus died. Jesus Christ in the Holy Bible never mentioned the word "Hell" because Hell hadn't been invented yet. Jesus spoke of Gehenna and Sheol. Every time that Jesus says Gehenna or Sheol the modern Bible writers insert their own word "Hell". In the New Revised Standard Version Holy Christian Bible every time that Jesus says "Hell" there is an asterisk beside the word "Hell*". If you look in the footnote for the original Greek word it always says either Gehenna or Sheol. Gehenna was a spot just south of Jerusalem where the Jewish and non Jewish people sacrificed their first born sons on fire altars for a thousand years to the God Baal. Jesus often spoke of Sheol. Sheol was the place underground where both the good and evil spirits went together after death, according to Jesus Christ in the New Testament followed by 2 billion Christians and 1 billion Muslims. This is not newsworthy but the fact that Doctor Joshua Perper condidered Anna Nicole Smith's anus to be unremarkable in his autopsy report is a world wide front page headline. Let Nancy Grace unleash the lawyers on this one paragraph for the next three months.
About the Author
Karen Fish is a writer currently living in Los Angeles California. The Temple of Love http://www.thetempleoflove.com
